Journal 36 Being Yourself

I believe that it is very important to be yourself.  Pretending to be someone else would give people a different picture of who you really are.  By acting like another person, you are in a way creating a clone of that person and in the process losing your own identity.  Imagine if everyone decided that they wanted to be Walt Disney.  Although Walt Disney may have been a good person who inspired countless artists, children, and adults, this would not be a desirable scenario.  Just picture it.  Everywhere you look there is a Walt Disney personality.  Perhaps this gives a representation of how necessary originality is in our world.  Everyone has special skill.  Those skills may not be the same as that person's friends or peers; the individual may not even know that he or she has any skills.  These talents, perhaps for a while unrecognizable, provide contributions for society and, if used right, make it a better place.  Since everyone has their own calling in life, it would be a waste to try to mimic what someone else's purpose is.  This blocks the person from reaching his or her potential.   How can a person come to develop his or her own talents if he or she is too busy acting like someone else?  Oftentimes, someone may want to act like someone else because that person is talented at something, attractive, smart, or funny, etc. . . .  So, instead of realizing that he himself is special, that person may want to follow the crowd in order to gain popularity or feel better about himself.  The Bible reminds us, however, that it is what is in a person’s heart that is truly important, not how funny, attractive, or intelligent he is. 

“But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7) 

Before anyone was born, that person was given a special purpose in life.  Spending any time trying to be a clone of someone else would be a waste of the talents that the talents that we already possess. 

"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well.
 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
    intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
    the days that were formed for me,
    when as yet there was none of them."  (Psalm 119:14-16)

"1 Samuel 16:7 (English Standard Version)." BibleGateway.com. Crossway Bibles, 2001. Web. 6 Mar. 2013.

"Psalm 139:14-16 (English Standard Version)." BibleGateway.com. Crossway Bibles, 2001. Web. 6 Mar. 2013.

Journal 35

My most recent blog post discussing Walt Whitman's search for self seems to have shown slight improvements from a post that I had written concerning the Declaration of Independence.  On my prior writing, I must not have proof-read very well because I found that in one of the sentences I wrote "they can also been" instead of "they could have also been" or "they can also be".  Sometimes grammatical errors such as this happen when I know what I am thinking for an essay, but my mind forgets the correct tense of the sentence as I am typing or my typing speed cannot keep up with what I am thinking.  Also in the discussion concerning the Declaration of Independence, I did not appear to leave a space in between the paragraphs.  I think that doing this appears neater and further emphasizes a change in topic from the paragraph above.  It is possible that I left a space when I typed the post in Microsoft Word, but sometimes after copying and pasting, any gaps between lines are taken out.  At least, that is what I have noticed previous times when I was about to publish a post.  Furthermore, I had mentioned an event that I remembered learning in my history class.  This is fine as long as it fits in with the theme of the blog discussion, however, I neglected to give a citation for the book from which I received that information.  It is important when writing to always give due credit to whatever is used and analyzed in a writing.  Several words, also, had been used as quotations from the Declaration of Independence itself.  It was useful to use these as a reference to help prove my point, yet they should have been placed inside quotation marks to set them apart from the rest of the sentence and to show that they had come from the document.  Finally, I did use a few examples in order to demonstrate my point of view, but looking back, if I would have used more quotes then my argument would have been even stronger.  

Journal 34

Describing my self- that is something that would be difficult for me since I am not sure of the answer.  I often lose myself in thinking about who I am and who I want to be, but I am left with only a load of questions in return.  Still, I will try.  I am a Christian and I enjoy helping others where I am able and going to my church and youth group.  Just because someone is a Christian does not mean, however, that he or she is a perfect person.  I am by no means perfect, and no one is.  I try to do the right thing but often fall short.  It never ceases to astonish me how God can still love me despite my constant mistakes; this will forever be incomprehensible for me.  I have made so many mistakes that I wish that I could go back and fix.  I often feel guilty about something that I have done and I may skip church one week because I feel that not only have I gone to far to be forgiven, but I don't want to be forgiven because it is not what I deserve.  As far as personality is concerned, I am much more relaxed when I am alone and listening to music.  I am quiet and shy except around the few that I am close to.  I value qualities such as honesty, loyalty, and self-denial to help someone else.  I admire people who put others above themselves.  I also believe in second-chances.  Everyone makes mistakes from time to time and needs to be forgiven.  The people that are able to freely offer forgiveness are also role models for me.  This is something that is very hard to do, especially if the person really hurt you, whether physically or emotionally.  Most of all, I admire those who are willing to lose everything, even their own lives, for a just cause they believe in.  And so, this is the closest that I can come to describing my self in a blog post. 

Journal 33

There are many ways in which people can reduce stress in their lives.  One thing that I enjoy doing when I am feeling down is going outside at nighttime and look at the stars.  I also enjoy being in the woods and just wandering around.  Being outside in nature often helps me momentarily to forget about whatever I am going through.  Music is a must.  I absolutely love music and would feel lost without it.  Singing along makes me become even more immersed in the song and its meaning.  Exercise gives a more physical release to "work away" any emotions pulling me down.  I like to lose myself in reading books, especially history books.  Sleep is another solution, although not preferable since the more sleep I get, the more stressed I become.  Although I generally prefer to be alone when I am not feeling very well, going to church and youth group helps me to remember that whatever I am going through is nothing compared to what Jesus went through, and because He was victorious over the grave, we have hope of eternal life with Him in Heaven.  Doing God's will is what life is truly about.  I know this, yet sometimes I forget this and because of my selfishness I can only think about what a failure I am and that I will never be able to succeed.  Going to church and youth group helps me realize the error in these thoughts, that God created everyone with a special purpose, and that I should not give up.  This provides a major stress reliever in my life.  I know that the Bible says to not worry about anything, but that is a harder task than it may seem.  There are loads of things that one could be concerned about: the health of a family member, financial stability, where the future is going to go, if you are living up to the expectations that others have of you, family issues; the list can go on and on.  Whatever means a person might use to escape stress, it is always best to try to avoid such feelings and to seek guidance from the Lord because he cares about that person's well-being. 
 

Matthew 6:25- 34

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?[a] 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.  34 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. (Matthew 6:25- 34)

 "Matthew 6:25-34 (English Standard Version)." BibleGateway.com. Crossway Bibles, 2001. Web. 3 Mar. 2013.

Journal 32

I wonder what it would be like to revolutionize the way that people think or do things.  It seems as though it might be cool to know that you have left an impact of society.  This would provide a sense of accomplishment in a person's life- knowing that society has been improved because of something that he or she has done.  This is what many people want in life, at least when they are younger.  They see the flaws in others and are convinced that they have the solution to fix everything.  This dream often becomes lost as the person grows older or it is left unsatisfied.  For those who actually come up with a successful idea, product, or whatever the improvement might be, they would probably receive lots of praise, recognition, and respect.  There would, of course, be some opposition as people in general do not like change.  One could come up with a multitude of reasons to be against such diversions from life as they had been accustomed to; it all depends on what the change involves.  Just because an idea is new does not mean, however, that it would be beneficial.  I believe that people should analyze for themselves whether society is changing for the better and if they choose to be a part of it.  For some people, technology is great.  Many people today would find it difficult to live without their electronics, even though they are not necessary for survival.  Others, for instance the Amish, chose that these new inventions were not for them and they continue to live a simpler way of life.  There is nothing wrong with that.  It is good for a person to make decisions based on his or her own beliefs and ideals rather than automatically conforming to society whichever way it goes.  Being able to leave an impact of the way people live is a huge responsibility that should be handled with the utmost consideration, and even then, people should make decisions for themselves on whether the change is for them or not. 

Journal 31

We all know that gossip is wrong.  Yet when something interesting happens, our conscience seems to go out the window.  Gossip is not only wrong morally, it also can have damaging effects on a person.  If the person being talked about hears the conversation, whether by being in a close proximity at the time or by the message spreading, then that person may develop some emotional issues.  This might not be the case if the person has a really strong personality that doesn't let what others say or do affect him or her.  However, that saying that "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" is often not the case.  I knew a girl back at my old school who had been gossiped about.  She was such a nice person who would smile and ask how your day has been going.  She didn't fit in well with the other girls in her grade, though.  They were pretty much opposites and would prey on her.  The more modest terms that they called her were words like "fat", "ugly", and "stupid".  None of these terms were true about her, but when she heard what the others were saying about her, she became depressed.  I got to talk to her a little here and there and I reassured her that she is smart, pretty, and has an amazing and caring personality, which is what really makes a person beautiful.  She said that she believed what I was saying, but I got the feeling that she wasn't really sure of who she was anymore and deep down she doubted everything that I said.  I tried to spend more time with her after that to make sure that she was doing alright.  As time wore I never saw her eat anything except once in a while she may have brought in a granola bar.  She always wore a jacket.  It was in the high 80's one day in May and she was still wearing that jacket.  I knew why, and I felt like there was nothing that I could do to help.  She eventually recovered.  I invited her to go to church with me and she talked to the pastor for a while and he helped her get through the hatred for herself.  I guess that my point here is that gossip has far-reaching consequences that may go unnoticed to who do it.  Even if the person never finds out that people were talking about him or her, that person's reputation can still be damaged and he or she is not even giving a chance to defend himself or herself.  It takes a special kind of character to not gossip at times, and many times people do it without even realizing, but making the choice to watch what you say is always the best choice.

Journal 30

Civil rights are an important part of any society.  They provide guidance and equality for a nation's citizens. Civil rights are meant to be shared by all citizens under the law, regardless of factors such as creed, race, gender, or the like.  There had been times in history, and still are today, when certain persons were not given their due rights.  People were kept from voting, owning land, having equal opportunities, and much more; immigrants had even been shipped back to their home country without trial.  Clearly our society here in the United States is not perfect.  It never has been and it never will be.  It has, however, improved significantly in the terms of granting people such as women, minorities, and immigrants the same freedoms or at least comparable to those of "normal" citizens.  This happened because people got together and decided that they were tired of being treated as inferior to others with no justifiable reason.  How would African Americans be treated today had the African American Rights Movement not taken place?  What reason would people and the government have to change their attitudes and actions?  I am not so certain tat they would have, at least, not so quickly as had actually taken place.  I cannot even fathom not being allowed to vote when I turn eighteen.  Voting is a right, as I see it, that can easily be left unappreciated, despite its significance.  Our country would not be a democracy if its citizens were withheld the privilege of voting.  How could it be if the people were not able to give their input on how they view the nation should be run?  Now, if only a group of this nation's citizens were given this capability, would the nation then be but a partial democracy since only a portion of the people living within its boundaries are granted the vote?  Whatever they may be, civil rights offer basic freedoms and guidelines which are necessary for the total well-being of those who call the land their home.  

Journal 29

About a year ago, my mom, dad, and I went to visit my aunt, uncle, and cousins in Florida during the summer.  My cousin, Shelby, plays volleyball and I used to play volleyball, so we decided to go to the beach and play together.  The drive was only about fifteen or twenty minutes, I think, and then we arrived at the beach.  We jumped out of the car with the volleyball and found an open space with a net to play at.  Shelby, as I discovered, was a very talented player.  Although the score stayed relatively close up until the end, she had a lead on me from the very beginning.  Not having played for a couple of years, it was a little more challenging for me than for her, who was currently in-season at the time.  We had been playing for quite a while when in-between serves I asked her where our water bottles were at.  We were both dismayed when we realized that in the rush getting to the beach, the water bottles were left at her house.  Despite it being a very hot day and that we were without water, we decided to keep on playing until the game ended.  So we played for a while longer, I am not sure how long it was, until I began to feel really dizzy and weak.  Apparently I fainted from a heat stroke and was unconscious for a while.  When I finally was awake again, I was told that Shelby ran over to get my parents who at the time were in their air-conditioned car in the parking lot and we all went back to the house, knowing that I would be better in a while.  Later that day, we all went to Dairy Queen to get a milkshake.  For whatever reason, the building was empty besides the workers.  When we went to order, the cashier heard us say that I had recently fainted from the heat.  She began talking about today was really hot and how she herself almost got a heat stroke from playing softball for too long.  I told her the story of how my cousin and I had been playing volleyball at the beach.  That’s when she said that she plays volleyball as well.  We talked a bit more about different things and the conversation ended with us scheduling a time to get together and play volleyball with Shelby.  This time, we took plenty of breaks and actually remembered to bring the water.  I ended up becoming friends with Clara, the cashier at Dairy Queen, and we still talk on the phone and on Facebook, and I plan to see her again the next time I am in Florida. 

Journal 28

Once in a while I go over to visit some of my family that lives in a small town about an hour away from where I live.  I have been going there ever since I was little and it has always amazed me.  When people say that in small towns there are no secrets and that everyone knows everyone, well, I guess that it’s true.  When I would go in town with my family, it seemed so astonishing to me, especially when I was younger, that people would walk up to my uncle or aunt and ask how other members of the family had been doing (mentioning them by name), and then my aunt or uncle would do likewise.  This happened a lot.  We would walk in a store and a person working there or perhaps another customer would see us, or perhaps we would see him or her first, and a whole new conversation would begin.  It boggled my mind how the town was such a close-knit community.  “Are there any people here”, I thought, “that don’t know one another?”  Also notable, perhaps tying in with the personal connections is that the people seemed really friendly.  I live outside a small to moderate size city where life is much less personal.  Some people that you pass are a bit rude, workers may be impartial, and if you wait two seconds before turning on a green light then you most likely will get honked at, perhaps with a middle finger.  This is definitely not the case where my family lives.  Even though it is only about an hour’s drive away, the people in general are much more polite, the workers all seem cooperative and friendly, and horns might as well be non-existent.  It is difficult to explain, but the town had its own feel to it.  People there are kind and welcoming.  I really enjoy going to visit.  One just has to make sure that he or she is not going over the speed limit or breaking any other traffic violations, otherwise his or her name will be put in that week’s paper. 

Journal 27

As Americans, I believe that we are very fortunate to have brave men and women who are willing to sacrifice their own lives in order to defend our country.  Such disposition is truly admirable.  Thinking about this, I pondered how I would feel in their shoes- being miles away from home defending my country.  It might be easy to say, and perhaps even believe, that you would not be scared and would choose to die a hero without any second thoughts.  While many service men and women are willing to do, and many have done, the latter, that does not mean that they are machines with no feelings or sense of danger.  If in a risky situation, I believe that they recognize the threat and sometimes perhaps may become a bit nervous.  It is their character that helps them push past this to fight for what they believe in.  I can only imagine being in their position.  Even if they are not in an area of high level threats, they still give up so much.  Many have family and friends that they leave behind.  Due to the distance, communication is limited.  To take away some of the loneliness, their comrades often become like a second family to them.  Personally, since I am not an extremely sociable person, I would probably be able to last a deployment in terms of being away from family and friends, although it would be very lonely. Soldiers also have to undergo lots of training and exercises to stay in top shape.  I felt like I was about to die after doing one hundred burpees at the end of track practice a couple of years ago.  Nothing but determination kept me going and I am sure that it is likewise with the much more difficult training that is given in the military.  All in all, I believe that while being far away from home in an unfamiliar land would carry a bit of uncertainty, loneliness, and a multitude of other feelings, it is a soldier’s willpower to defend his or her country that enables them to keep going.