Sunday, November 4, 2012

The Time When I was Most Scared


I have a friend named Suzanne whom I used to go to school with.  We were really close friends and spent lots of time together.  She was somewhat of a perfectionist and she brought a little of that out in me as well the more that we hung out.  She was very passionate about everything that she did and I admired that.  She spent endless hours studying for her classes not because she had to but because she wanted to.  She loved school, being with her friends, and participating in any activities that she was involved in.  Over time, I began to notice a change in her.  She would still study a bit for her classes but it was with dread and she did not care like she used to if she got a bad grade on an assignment or even a test.  This was really shocking.  Normally, I would ask her if she wanted to hang out and she would be all for it.  Now it seemed like she did not want to be around anyone, even her best friend.  She quit all of the clubs and sports that she was involved in.  This amplified my concern because she had participated in those events for several years now and always seemed to enjoy them.  She wouldn't sit with us at lunch anymore.  She began to sit by herself and she always looked so sad.  She wouldn't even eat lunch anymore; she would just hide behind papers from various classes pretending to study.  I did not know what was going on with her so I would go and sit by her at lunch and just talk.  It seemed like she was in her own world.  I would offer her something to eat and she would tell me that she cannot.  I asked her why and she said because she does not deserve to eat.  This confused and worried me. 

We talked a while longer and began to understand a little of her thought process, although all of her reasoning put together was too complicated for even me to understand.  I knew that she had always held herself to a high standard and would not tolerate any flaws.  When she would receive criticism she would take it to heart and become depressed for a while.  I also knew that she had been having issues with eating disorders for the past few years, but things always seemed to work out okay and she would start to eat again.  Suzanne talked to me about how she does not understand one of her classes and is not doing as well as she should in the others.  I distinctively remember her calling herself a “failure” and “worthless”.  She talked about how her family was going through some issues and how one of her family members would criticize her every time that they saw each other.  She also told me that she had not eaten for about a week and she does not want to or else she will become fat and even more of a failure.  Of course, I was scared.  Suzanne was my best friend in the whole world and she was talking as if she were suicidal.  I asked her about the cuts on her arms and she said that her cat scratched her.  “Come on, Suzanne, you don’t even have a cat” I said.  I told the counselor and she talked to Suzanne, but to no avail.

 About another week or so later, I begged her to eat something and told her that if she kept harming herself then I would too.  She decided that she would eat again for me but only a little.  I was so happy.  I gave her an apple but she could not eat that because it was too much for her stomach to handle.  She had to start off with ice to get her body used to eating again.  While this relieved my fears at the moment, she never completely recovered and still suffers from anorexia today.

No comments:

Post a Comment