Journal #39: Spring Break

This spring break I stayed in town.  I did not really do too much.  On the Thursday we got out of school, I went with my dad to the Maundy Thursday church service.  On Friday of break, I went to my church to help prepare food for the Easter breakfast that my youth group is in charge of.  On Saturday, my cousins were in town so I went to have dinner with them at Texas Roadhouse.  Then, on Sunday, I arrived at the church again early to prepare and help serve the Easter breakfast.  Not much else happened that day.  My mom cooked a ham for herself and my dad, but I could not have any because I am a vegetarian.  Instead, I just found a few things to eat around the house.  On the following Friday, I went to help my dad at his office.  At some point of time I went to Lincoln Memorial Gardens to walk around the trails and also to see about volunteer opportunities in the future.  As it turned out, my friend was at the gardens too, and I went with her to her house for about an hour or so after we were done with our walk.  She had recently got a new hamster, and it was really interesting watching it run around and nibble on carrots (at least until it accidently bit my finger).  I also took my dog out to the local dog park; he really enjoyed playing with the other dogs that were there and it was a treat for him since we had not gone since before winter.  I was also able to see my brother and his family.  I played scrabble with my nieces and nephews and I also took them outside to see the chickens, which they really enjoyed seeing.  Other than that, I tried to spend time preparing for tests, studying, and reading.  I did not get as much accomplished as I had hoped, but I still did get quite a bit done. 

Journal #38: Job Shadowing

Last week, I had the privilege of being able to job shadow at the State's Attorney’s Office, which is located inside the Sangamon County Courthouse building.  I really enjoyed the experience.  Everyone that I met was very welcoming and open to talk about what their career is like.  For the most part, I followed one attorney around to different office and court rooms.  She and a few other attorneys explained the process of a court trial and tried their best to elaborate on the proceedings.  I was able to sit-in for preliminaries, traffic court, felonies, and other events taking place.  One lawyer working on a DUI case explained the case to me and another student who was job shadowing from the same high school.  He showed us the evidence in the form of a video and afterwards asked us if the defendant would be found guilty or innocent.  We both thought that the evidence was substantial enough that the verdict would come back guilty, and we were surprised when he said that in DUI cases, the jury often decides that the defendant is not guilty, despite contradictory evidence, because they do not see those individuals as criminals.  Something else that I found interesting was being given the chance to get to talk to a few judges.  I am glad that I was able to participate in this activity and I feel that I have learned a bit more than I had known before about what it is like to be an attorney.  I still cannot say for certain if that is the career that I would like to pursue, however, since a large part of an attorney’s typical day often includes large amounts of paperwork and reports.  I did not get to see this part because it was deemed too boring, so instead I was able to watch other functions that litigators might perform, such as at prelims.  One thing that I do like about attorneys is that do their best to ensure that justice is done.  Without them, it would be a much harder task to defend oneself in court.  I intend on keeping my options open for the future, but I will keep legal studies in mind. 

Journal #37: Listening to "Blue Monk"

Imagery can not only be seen in literary works such as poems, but it also exists in songs, even songs that do not contain any lyrics.  The tone of the song can help create an emotional feeling and bring about an overall picture of some event in a listener's mind.  These pictures can vary for different people as each person has a unique imagination and perhaps experiences which might somehow connect with the imagery.  While listening to the song called Blue Monk, I pictured the spring, summer, and fall seasons.  I could see my family outside in the spring plowing the ground and planting seeds.  The rainstorms and summer static lightning were clearly seen as well.  I would go outside during the rainstorms and the heavy winds to be outside and enjoy the weather.  Occasionally I might try to catch a as many raindrops on my tongue as I could.  The grass turned a vivid green and the trees and flowers began to bloom.  It was so beautiful and I wanted to spend all of my time outside.  I envisioned myself dropping the seeds for corn in the big field and almost passing out in the heat from being outside for too long, as I had apparently waited too long to begin planting.  The corn finally began to grow, and before long it was taller than I was.  I would go outside and practice archery, hoping that I did not overshoot my target and loose the arrow forever in the corn field or even worse, bury it under the ground.  Then, I saw my mom spraying the fruit trees to kill unwanted Japanese beetles.  I went to pick the ripe vegetables and berries in the garden, and my dad was outside cutting the grass.  The chickens were there too.  To alert that they were out of food, they would bock and then follow me all the way from the back door of the house out to the chicken coup like the Israelites followed Moses.  The last image that I saw was of the leaves changing colors in the fall.

Journal 36 Being Yourself

I believe that it is very important to be yourself.  Pretending to be someone else would give people a different picture of who you really are.  By acting like another person, you are in a way creating a clone of that person and in the process losing your own identity.  Imagine if everyone decided that they wanted to be Walt Disney.  Although Walt Disney may have been a good person who inspired countless artists, children, and adults, this would not be a desirable scenario.  Just picture it.  Everywhere you look there is a Walt Disney personality.  Perhaps this gives a representation of how necessary originality is in our world.  Everyone has special skill.  Those skills may not be the same as that person's friends or peers; the individual may not even know that he or she has any skills.  These talents, perhaps for a while unrecognizable, provide contributions for society and, if used right, make it a better place.  Since everyone has their own calling in life, it would be a waste to try to mimic what someone else's purpose is.  This blocks the person from reaching his or her potential.   How can a person come to develop his or her own talents if he or she is too busy acting like someone else?  Oftentimes, someone may want to act like someone else because that person is talented at something, attractive, smart, or funny, etc. . . .  So, instead of realizing that he himself is special, that person may want to follow the crowd in order to gain popularity or feel better about himself.  The Bible reminds us, however, that it is what is in a person’s heart that is truly important, not how funny, attractive, or intelligent he is. 

“But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7) 

Before anyone was born, that person was given a special purpose in life.  Spending any time trying to be a clone of someone else would be a waste of the talents that the talents that we already possess. 

"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well.
 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
    intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
    the days that were formed for me,
    when as yet there was none of them."  (Psalm 119:14-16)

"1 Samuel 16:7 (English Standard Version)." BibleGateway.com. Crossway Bibles, 2001. Web. 6 Mar. 2013.

"Psalm 139:14-16 (English Standard Version)." BibleGateway.com. Crossway Bibles, 2001. Web. 6 Mar. 2013.

Journal 35

My most recent blog post discussing Walt Whitman's search for self seems to have shown slight improvements from a post that I had written concerning the Declaration of Independence.  On my prior writing, I must not have proof-read very well because I found that in one of the sentences I wrote "they can also been" instead of "they could have also been" or "they can also be".  Sometimes grammatical errors such as this happen when I know what I am thinking for an essay, but my mind forgets the correct tense of the sentence as I am typing or my typing speed cannot keep up with what I am thinking.  Also in the discussion concerning the Declaration of Independence, I did not appear to leave a space in between the paragraphs.  I think that doing this appears neater and further emphasizes a change in topic from the paragraph above.  It is possible that I left a space when I typed the post in Microsoft Word, but sometimes after copying and pasting, any gaps between lines are taken out.  At least, that is what I have noticed previous times when I was about to publish a post.  Furthermore, I had mentioned an event that I remembered learning in my history class.  This is fine as long as it fits in with the theme of the blog discussion, however, I neglected to give a citation for the book from which I received that information.  It is important when writing to always give due credit to whatever is used and analyzed in a writing.  Several words, also, had been used as quotations from the Declaration of Independence itself.  It was useful to use these as a reference to help prove my point, yet they should have been placed inside quotation marks to set them apart from the rest of the sentence and to show that they had come from the document.  Finally, I did use a few examples in order to demonstrate my point of view, but looking back, if I would have used more quotes then my argument would have been even stronger.  

Journal 34

Describing my self- that is something that would be difficult for me since I am not sure of the answer.  I often lose myself in thinking about who I am and who I want to be, but I am left with only a load of questions in return.  Still, I will try.  I am a Christian and I enjoy helping others where I am able and going to my church and youth group.  Just because someone is a Christian does not mean, however, that he or she is a perfect person.  I am by no means perfect, and no one is.  I try to do the right thing but often fall short.  It never ceases to astonish me how God can still love me despite my constant mistakes; this will forever be incomprehensible for me.  I have made so many mistakes that I wish that I could go back and fix.  I often feel guilty about something that I have done and I may skip church one week because I feel that not only have I gone to far to be forgiven, but I don't want to be forgiven because it is not what I deserve.  As far as personality is concerned, I am much more relaxed when I am alone and listening to music.  I am quiet and shy except around the few that I am close to.  I value qualities such as honesty, loyalty, and self-denial to help someone else.  I admire people who put others above themselves.  I also believe in second-chances.  Everyone makes mistakes from time to time and needs to be forgiven.  The people that are able to freely offer forgiveness are also role models for me.  This is something that is very hard to do, especially if the person really hurt you, whether physically or emotionally.  Most of all, I admire those who are willing to lose everything, even their own lives, for a just cause they believe in.  And so, this is the closest that I can come to describing my self in a blog post. 

Journal 33

There are many ways in which people can reduce stress in their lives.  One thing that I enjoy doing when I am feeling down is going outside at nighttime and look at the stars.  I also enjoy being in the woods and just wandering around.  Being outside in nature often helps me momentarily to forget about whatever I am going through.  Music is a must.  I absolutely love music and would feel lost without it.  Singing along makes me become even more immersed in the song and its meaning.  Exercise gives a more physical release to "work away" any emotions pulling me down.  I like to lose myself in reading books, especially history books.  Sleep is another solution, although not preferable since the more sleep I get, the more stressed I become.  Although I generally prefer to be alone when I am not feeling very well, going to church and youth group helps me to remember that whatever I am going through is nothing compared to what Jesus went through, and because He was victorious over the grave, we have hope of eternal life with Him in Heaven.  Doing God's will is what life is truly about.  I know this, yet sometimes I forget this and because of my selfishness I can only think about what a failure I am and that I will never be able to succeed.  Going to church and youth group helps me realize the error in these thoughts, that God created everyone with a special purpose, and that I should not give up.  This provides a major stress reliever in my life.  I know that the Bible says to not worry about anything, but that is a harder task than it may seem.  There are loads of things that one could be concerned about: the health of a family member, financial stability, where the future is going to go, if you are living up to the expectations that others have of you, family issues; the list can go on and on.  Whatever means a person might use to escape stress, it is always best to try to avoid such feelings and to seek guidance from the Lord because he cares about that person's well-being. 
 

Matthew 6:25- 34

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?[a] 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.  34 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. (Matthew 6:25- 34)

 "Matthew 6:25-34 (English Standard Version)." BibleGateway.com. Crossway Bibles, 2001. Web. 3 Mar. 2013.